From Surviving to Thriving
Embracing Resilience in Life's Darkest Moments
Introduction:
Do you consider yourself a resilient person? Has anyone ever told you that you are a resilient person? I thought I knew what it mean to be resilient until recent years when I hit a hard rock. Yes, rock bottom! My rock bottom. You know the kind of rock bottom that you experience before you make a life or death decision or the one that knocks you straight to your knees and you surrender to your higher power. That’s the kind of rock bottom I’m talking about. Before I explain, I invite you to erase whatever meaning of resiliency you currently hold.
Most of us are taught that when something challenging happens or we are faced with a difficult life experience that we need to “push through” which is what I did the majority of my life.
If we look at the Merriam-Webster dictionary it defines resilience as: “an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.”
I think we need to understand there is a difference between resiliency and coping in the context of healing. It wasn’t until I was thick in the mud that I had an aha moment of what this really meant. I portrayed myself as a really resilient person because I avoided any subject that closely resembled the skeletons in my closet. I was able to keep myself so busy as a coping mechanism that I did not have an opportunity to work through the adversities which was preventing my personal growth and hindered my resiliency. This coping mechanism served its purpose until it didn’t.
I remember having a conversation with someone when I was having a hard time with triggers and PTSD. She told me “you just need to learn how to cope.” I responded “what do you think I’ve done all my life?” In my humble opinion, all I have done was cope to survive. I was at a point that I was exhausted from it all. Plus, my coping mechanisms were no longer working for me. I was at a whole new level of intense triggers. I wanted to finally go from surviving to thriving and that is when the real intense healing journey started which has been the catalyst to becoming truly resilient. I finally sought the help I needed from a variety of medical providers, therapists, and alternative practitioners. It was a very long and intense process, but it was so worth it at the end. After the initial physical healing, I switched to a trauma informed therapist and we began EMDR therapy. After a while, I started exploring spiritual healing and that is when I was introduced to Reiki and sound healing. All of this has lead to where I am today to be able to share my story in a way to help others.
To me resiliency means facing and working through the experience to learn the life lessons so you can be a light for others that walk down the similar paths.
An example of this is when I was diagnosed with osteoporosis at the age of 43 years-old. I felt so defeated especially because I was diagnosed just months after an intense physical healing journey and I remember telling my boss that I just want to give up and lay on the couch and eat bon bons until I die because there was no point trying anymore. I actually scared her when I said that. I think I felt defeated because it was another layer of triggers that I had not faced yet. After doing some work and speaking to the endocrinologist, she told me the best thing for me to do was to attend Better Bones & Balance classes to help prevent me from falling. I started taking the classes and within 6 months I was invited to become a certified Better Bones & Balance fitness instructor. I have the pleasure to lead the class and I have become a light for others in their journey.
In conclusion
Resilience is not merely about pushing through challenges or relying on coping mechanisms to survive. True resilience is born from the courage to face our adversities head-on, to work through the pain and the discomfort, and to emerge stronger and more empowered on the other side.
My journey from rock bottom to where I stand today is a testament to the transformative power of resilience. It wasn't until I confronted my deepest fears and sought the help I needed that I began to truly heal and thrive. Through the support of medical providers, therapists, and alternative practitioners, I discovered new tools and modalities that aided in my healing journey.
But resilience is not just about overcoming our own struggles—it's also about using our experiences to uplift and inspire others. Whether it's leading Better Bones & Balance fitness classes or simply sharing my story, I strive to be a beacon of hope for those who may be navigating similar paths.
So, I invite you to redefine your understanding of resilience. It's not just about weathering the storms; it's about finding the strength within ourselves to navigate them with grace and courage. And in doing so, we not only become lights for ourselves but also for those who walk beside us in their own journeys of healing and growth. Together, may we continue to embrace the true essence of resilience and thrive in every aspect of our lives.
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